Sunday, April 30, 2006

The Gift and the Curse.

In the early 80’s, my friend’s father had a Porsche 930 (before there was a 911 Turbo, there were 930’s in Europe; he had it imported to the States), that he washed every weekend. My dad had a perpetual subscription to Car and Driver that I studied from the moment I could read. Combine this with the fact that just about every toy made for little boys has something to do with automobiles – I became hooked.

I like cars probably as much as it’s possible to like a non-living object. Ever since I came to that realization, I have always dreamed of having a sweet car that I washed on the weekends. And here I am, washing away, making sure this sucker is incredibly clean on a continual basis. It’s almost bizarre how happy it makes me to wash my car, and I know it makes no sense, but what can I say – everyone has their “thing.” At least I’m not smoking crack.

Monika says “why are you taking more pictures of your car? Not only do you not already have that same picture over and over again, you have it taken by a PROFESSIONAL photographer!” And she’s totally correct. But that will never stop me!






Aaaaaaaaaah. (that's the sound of sweet relief)

If there is one car I will probably never get out of my head, it’s this – the hottest car ever made. It will be mine. Oh, yes…it will be mine. The Lamborghini Countach 25th Anniversary Edition:

That car is so hot it makes Ferarris look like something I would drop after eating a few Taco Bell bean burritos. Okay, perhaps not quite that bad, but close.

I hope you all are also having a nice, relaxing Sunday afternoon.

Thursday, April 27, 2006

Idol Worship.

I finally caught my first episode of American Idol yesterday. Here are my impressions:

Katharine McPhee: Initial thought was “she’s going to win this competition.” Not necessarily because she’s the best, but she’s the archetype of the kind of person that wins American Idol.

Kellie Pickler: God-awful. Your superior was chosen last season. Next!

Elliott Yamin: This guy can sing. But…he’s not an Idol.

Paris Bennett: She’s got the pipes! However, and this is only because on Scatterbrain I tell it like it is, she’s not Christina Aguilera, Mary J Blige, or Kelly Clarkson. This goes for the men as well (wait ‘till Taylor) – I don’t believe that vocals alone are enough to grab the idol crown. The performer has to have sex appeal. And Paris is just too…cute. But not in a good way.

Taylor Hicks: I like him. He is a great performer, but like Paris, I just don’t see him going yard. He seems like he'd appeal big-time to the mid-30's - mid-60's demographic, but that doesn't seem to be Idol's target audience. However, I do think he’ll have moderate success on the lounge singing circuit after the competition, regardless of how far he goes.

Chris Daughtry: Please, for the love of God, let this guy win! He rocks, he has passion, and his voice is killer; he lacks the spit-and-polish the others have, and actually feels somewhat organic, which I like. Then again, his skills and “product” remind me a lot of Bo Bice.

I’m calling McPhee over Daughtry in the final.

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Rest in Peace.

Monika's father passed away on Monday. Please keep us in your prayers.

Link.

Sunday, April 23, 2006

Links.

I decided to add a few links to blogs I (try to) regularly read, since you should regularly read them:

Cooking lessons. - My better half's foodie blog. You wish you could eat as well as I do! I have the luckiest stomach on earth.
Writing lessons. - Teacher. Wordsmith. Madman. Such a good teacher that he rekindled my desire to write.
Your ears will thank you. - Radiohead's site. Not spectacular, but since it's Radiohead it gets the link.
Love and Haterade - I discovered this site through TWM. I still think Crash was a good movie (inside joke), but nevertheless, she is an amazing writer and inspires me to be better.
Anonymous Lawyer - Freaking hilarious.
The Dilbert Blog - I'm an engineer. I think that's justification enough...

Enjoy!

Friday, April 21, 2006

"Clarity."

Occasionally my brain leaves Earth and I start conjuring song lyrics for my future rock opus. Here is an entry from some stream-of-consciousness action the other day:

Sitting here comatose
Not feeling so verbose
Did you say something to me?
I think I'm lacking clarity.

Movin' On Up!

It turns out that Scatterbrain now appears on page 1 of a Yahoo! search for "scatterbrain." I've also suddenly appeared on page 3 of the cherished Google search, which is obviously all that matters. I think I was on page 5-ish last time I checked.

Come to Scatterbrain, and tell all your friends! So I can get more hits, which will do absolutely nothing for me or mankind. But, you know...it'll be more...um...hits. Okay, at least I can expose more people to my unique brand of dementia.

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Squeaky Clean

Today, I went to the dentist at lunchtime, which is always a pleasurable experience for me, since my teeth can kick your teeth's...er...asses? Here is an X-ray:












I'd like to add, however, that this is only because I endured the annoyance of many years of braces and oral surgery beforehand. Here is an approximation of how my "grill" used to look - and check out the 24-K gold chains dropping out of my gums! (Totally not joking, either)














Man, those red bands around my braces were so freaking cool. Good God, I should find a picture of myself from back then and have some rapper flash it in a video. Just you wait - t-minus 1 year 'till "chains" are the hot new teeth-trend, beee-otch!

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

THE ENEMY:

Or, the return of the rage. (Taking a cue from Chad's blog)

Last night, my arch-nemesis returned.

It was 5 in the morning. I suddenly awoke from my deep slumber, wondering if I’d obtained a new, obnoxious alarm clock and hadn’t realized it.

But it was much, much worse. I’m including a file photo:



















Come to think of it, I vaguely recall putting on my slippers, walking outside, and stomping around in my boxers, and possibly yelling “Die! Die! Die!” while doing so. Or maybe I was weeping.

Either way, this is my vision of how this matter will be resolved:















I have my eye on you, you little bastards!

Sunday, April 16, 2006

We're Celebrities!

-Okay, not really, but Monika and I are in the paper this morning, which is pretty cool. Thanks to Terry and Barb for insisting upon it.

-Interestingly, the announcement indicates that I already have my MBA (whereas completion of requirements is pending 6 more months), but it's refreshing to see something like that on paper. So close...

-Last night our friends Erin and Andy got married. It was a beautiful ceremony, and I'm sure we'll have some pictures up soon. Congratulations, guys!

-Happy Easter, everyone! Get another bag of Cadbury Mini-Eggs while you can (I'm drooling like Homer Simpson now).

Saturday, April 15, 2006

Thunderstruck.

Today, I walked with Monika and her friends in the Komen “Race for the Cure,” which raises money to fight breast cancer, a most worthy cause.

Prior to the race, we wandered around downtown Fort Worth, visiting booths handing out free energy bars, bagels, bananas, etc. I grabbed an Asiago cheese bagel from Panera, but couldn’t finish it because I’d already had a Promax bar before we arrived downtown.

As the race approached us, we wandered toward the start line, and there she was, like a beacon of majestic light shining upon me.

My pulse quickened.

I felt beads of sweat upon my brow.

I composed myself as best I could, because I had to seize the opportunity to take a picture with her. She is so important to me, and literally touches me in a personal way on a daily basis. Frankly, I was just in awe of her presence alone, and had to muster great courage just to stand close enough to her for a picture.

Here it is – one of my proudest moments. I bow to you, my queen!








Thursday, April 13, 2006

The Dress Code.

Sometimes I’m particularly annoyed by my brain’s conflicting thoughts regarding my work clothes. On one hand, I should probably try to wear dark pants, nice shirts, tuck everything in, and look professional. On the other, when I go to the lab (or anywhere else other than my desk, for that matter), I typically hop on an industrial-yellow bike and ride over there, competing against 30-mph head-on winds with sand, bugs, and other airborne debris hitting me in the face. Those aren’t quite optimal conditions for being dressed well.

This is all not to mention that currently the highs for the day revolve around 85. In less than a month, I’m guessing, we’ll hit 90-Degree-Land, and another month thereafter it’ll be ~100 during the day. There’s nothing like breaking a nice sweat walking from the car to the desk in the morning, which leaves you feeling super-fresh for the rest of the day. Stanktacular!

You Heard It Here First!

...Regarding Lost last night.

Michael is now one of "The Others," and is going to lead "The Losties" into a huge trap.

Anyone disagree?

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

What I’ve Been Listening to Lately.

-Yeah Yeah Yeah’s - Show Your Bones. It rules. Their first full-length album, Fever to Tell, was incredibly disjointed, and while it’s somewhat impressive to hear how loud Karen O can scream, that doesn’t mean it’s pleasant. It’s already been written ad nauseum that Bones follows up where “Maps” left off, which is true, and fortunately so since “Maps” is probably somewhere in my top 50 songs of all time list.

-Rob Zombie - Educated Horses. It also rules. It’s a digression from the somewhat grandiose sounds that he concocted on his first two solo albums, and veers closer to the vibe I loved so much on the White Zombie albums, La Sexorcisto… and Astro Creep…. “Foxy Foxy” reminds me of “More Human than Human” in many ways, but mainly the characteristic that live, you’re equally likely to see people headbanging or dancing.

-She Wants Revenge: I’m an Interpol freak, so when I heard that SWR are doing their best to imitate Interpol (who did their best to imitate Joy Division…) I had to pick it up. Besides, it was only $6.99 from Target. You’ve got to love “Tear You Apart,” and you can’t help admire/be disgusted by the flagrancy with which they are trying to sound trendy – the lead singer said in a recent interview “our goal is to make girls either cry, or dance.” I didn’t know whether to laugh or hurl in recourse to such an audacious comment, and that’s my general feeling about the album – completely awesome when you’re in the mood for campy crap, but completely forgettable otherwise.

-Black Crowes – Greatest Hits 1990-1999: Beside the fact the person who decided to put “Jealous Again” as track 1 over “Twice as Hard” deserves to be slapped silly, this album is a great way to hear all the singles in one place. If you’ve never heard the Crowes, you should probably start with $hake Your Money Maker, which is a greatest hits CD in itself.

-Right now, I’m listening to the Arctic Monkeys:

Well I bet that you look good on the dance floor
Dancing to electro-pop like a robot from 1984
From 1984!
Oh there ain't no love no Montagues or Capulets
Just banging tunes and DJ sets and
Dirty dance floors and dreams of naughtiness!

The first time I heard the “Capulets/naughtiness” rhyme, I understood why the Monkeys are being touted as such great songwriters. Oh, and not to mention the fact that this record ROCKS. Check it out!

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Infrequency.

Lately I have become a bit frustrated by the fact that I’m so busy I can rarely find the time to post on Scatterbrain. So it is with great amusement (because, yes, it’s become comical to me at this point) I declare that things will probably get worse before they get better.

Most of you know that I work full-time and attend Carnegie Mellon for my MBA full-time. The culmination of the CMU MBA is a class called “Management Game,” where you engage in an international competition against hundreds of teams. I believe the top finishers are flown to CMU for an awards banquet of some sort as well.

Over lunchtime, we students had our Game orientation, where the professor gave us a broad overview of the class and the workload. The disturbing part was the number of times he told us that September is going to be busy. I believe all of the following phrases were used at various points in his presentation:

-“Amazingly busy”
-“It’s really going to be a tough experience”
-“You won’t believe just how much work you have to do”
-“During the month of September, you’re going to feel like you’re in a dark abyss. Afterward, you’re going to sort of have to claw your way back out into reality again.”
-“Look. To practice, just drop your pants and bend over, because it’s really the same sort of experience. Are you ready to be my bitch?”

Okay, he didn’t say the last one, but I swear he said the other ones! “Dark abyss?!” And when he mentioned that we’ll have to claw our way back to reality, he actually bent his fingers and made clawing motions up-and-down, like some sort of possessed zombie! I’m totally serious!

My only consolation at this point is that my team will be competing against students on campus. The students that live on campus are commonly referred to as “Full-Time” students, whereas my type are referred to as “Flex-Mode” students, since we aren’t physically on campus, and have to tap into class via a live video conference. Although I know zero “Full-Time” students, I throw caution to the wind in suspecting they are somewhat smug about their position and commonly chat about how they are far superior to Flex-Mode students. These brash comments are most likely made while they light cigars with $100 bills, while the Dean and Board of Regents fan them with large palm branches during badminton breaks.

I’m like the really surly Arnold from the first Terminator movie – it’s time kick some ass!!!

Saturday, April 01, 2006

Misc.

Congratulations to Costa (visiting from Austin for the weekend) who kicked ass in a racquetball tournament today, placing 2nd. He was oh-so-close to finishing first, but lost to his last opponent in a very close game.

Something very annoying: the freaking fire detectors in the apartment crap out what seems like every week. Right now I’m feeling a twitch of fury every other minute as this damn thing BEEPS obnoxiously.

Florida is about to close out George Mason’s impressive run. I’d really like to see them take on LSU. We’ll see.

How about Lost last Wednesday? I’m glad they finally delivered some information; they can only taunt the viewer so much before throwing us a bone...

BEEP

…Okay, I just got back from buying a battery to get the detector to shut up. On cue, as I drove home, Nine Inch Nails’ “Every Day is Exactly the Same” comes on the radio. Not only could that not have been any more appropriate, but it also initiates a bonus-rant – the radio edit!

You’re listening to a song you love on the radio. It starts, builds, and reaches the climax that will take the song home – perhaps a guitar solo, perhaps a few moments of silence. But – what the hell? The radio just took a dump on the flow of the song! Nuts to the integrity of the song when we could be playing godawful excerpts of unfunny snippets from our morning show!

This is not to mention the fact that the mix is completely screwed up as well. On “With Teeth,” the song begins with subdued piano-like notes, and then starts pounding away at you with aggressive drum and synthesizer work. On the radio, I heard piano, and then I had to turn the damn volume up because the mix for the rest of the song had been turned down to practically nothing. Classics like “Smells Like Teen Spirit,” that in their original form chew you up and spit you out during the chorus, become neutered from the essence of how the song is supposed to sound.

This is why I’m still one of the few (and yes, the proud) that actually buys CDs, appreciates the artwork, listens to albums in their entirety, and 99% of the time, hates listening to the radio.