The Dump and Jump.

This post is not for the faint of heart.

I see this atrocity at least a couple times per day.

1. Perpetrator unleashes a fierce atrocity upon the waterworks.

2. Perpetrator jumps off the toilet seat, heading in the direction of the exit.

2a. Occasionally perpetrator will stop by a faucet, touch both knobs, splash water on his hands for 1 second, then turn off the faucets, merely spreading his filth more thoroughly.

3. You know what's next (cover your eyes, children):

...And this is why I usually attempt to secure a paper towel of some sort to bust my way out of a public restroom that has a "pull" door on the way out.